Click HERE to watch video.
Will Smith is a man who appeared to have everything.
Will Smith's career
From his showbiz beginnings as part of a hip hop duo with DJ Jazzy Jeff and his role in the sitcom The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, to receiving his first Academy Award for King Richard, Smith achieved almost everything a professional entertainer could ask for – acclaimed roles, fame, riches, accolades, and lots of awards including a British Academy Film Award, a Screen Actors Guild Award, a Golden Globe Award, a Critics' Choice Movie Award. And Sunday night he was even a front runner to win his first Oscar (which he did, by the way). With all that, I'd like to believe he also enjoyed a measure of self-satisfaction and fulfillment.
Will Smith on Oscar Night
But none of that seemed to be enough to help Smith keep his emotions in check on Sunday night when comedian Chris Rock made fun of Smith's wife Jada Pinkett Smith's hair. In case you didn't know, Pinkett Smith has alopecia and has talked openly about her hair loss.
Rock was presenting the best documentary award and referred to Pinkett Smith's shaved head, asking if she was preparing to film the G.I. Jane sequel.
“Jada, I love ya,” Rock said. “G.I. Jane 2, can't wait to see it. All right?”
At first Smith laughed. But when Pinkett Smith rolled her eyes, her husband stopped laughing, jumped out of his seat, stomped up to the stage, and slapped a surprised Rock in the face.
Rock said, “Wow, wow… Will Smith just smacked the shit out of me.”
Smith returned to his seat and said, “Keep my wife's name out of your f-ing mouth!”
Rock responded, “Wow dude, it was a G.I. Jane joke.”
Smith repeated his threat.
Rock paused and said: “That was a… greatest night in the history of television,” and then returned to his presentation.
As if that wasn't enough for one night, Smith later won the Oscar for Best Actor.
When he received the award, Smith said (in part), “…I know, to do what we do, we got to be able to take abuse. You gotta be able to have people talk crazy about you. In this business, you gotta be able to have people disrespecting you and you gotta smile and pretend like that's OK. … Denzel said to me a few minutes ago, 'At your highest moment, be careful, that's when the devil comes for you.
' I want to be a vessel for love. I want to say ‘thank you' to Venus and Serena and the entire Williams family for trusting me with your story… I want to be an ambassador of that kind of love and care.”
He continued, “I want to apologize to the Academy, I want to apologize to all my fellow nominees… Art imitates life. I look like the crazy father, just like they said about Richard Williams! But love will make you do crazy things.”
It's interesting to note that Smith did not apologize to Rock until a long day later, but he did blame love for his outrageous behavior.
Chris Rock's Response
Compared to Smith, Rock was the consummate professional. After Smith struck him, he acknowledged what everyone had seen, paused to regain his composure, and then went on with his presentation. Later that night, the LAPD confirmed that Rock declined to press charges against his attacker. I'd sure like to believe I would be that calm and composed after suffering such unforeseen trouble on stage (although to be clear, I'm not looking forward to getting coldcocked).
When I did the research for my last book, Is That All There Is, one of the things I was most impressed with were the people I interviewed who said that they were satisfied in life and that they felt that they had found some measure of peace and satisfaction.
Not one person said they hadn't been tested or that their lives were always easy – everyone told eye-opening stories of troubles and triumphs, setbacks, and successes. But in the end, they generously offered wisdom that perhaps Will Smith needs to think about.
Terry Bell said, “Angst and frustration happens when we do things that don't line up with who we are.”
Nathalie Cadet-James said, “Try not to take anything too personally.”
Seth Werner said, “How you do anything is how you do everything.”
Musician, producer, and YouTuber Rick Beato said, “It's the opportunities you're presented with and what you do with those opportunities that makes you the person you are.”
Smith and Rock were offered very different opportunities the other night. And what they did with those opportunities says volumes about both of them.
What do Beato's words say about you? Please go to the “COMMENTS” tab below and let me know.
In the public eye (eternal social media), we’re defined by our worst moments! Maybe not fair, but so true.
There must be bad blood between Will Smith and Chris Rock. Two incredibly famous and successful black men in a white world. Also, I suspect Will and his wife have had issues where she has felt unsupported or unrecognized by Will as a husband – so I imagine he felt he had to live up to something in her eyes. I’m not a fan of Chris Rock (as opposed to Richard Pryor whom I couldn’t get enough of) so the slap didn’t bother me. I also suspect Will Smith lives in a world where everything is highly controlled and meticulously planned out whereas Rock is much more used to being fast on his feet and dodging and weaving in the face of adversity, like a joke that bombs and you have to pivot to the next super quick. Ultimately I think when the “good guy” shows anger it is a shock. But if you look at Will Smith’s work as an actor, his controlled rage is a huge asset in some of his most interesting roles (see Hancock for example). I think his apology to Rock was crucial, but I hope he doesn’t have to bend himself into a pretzel apologizing for the rest of his life and career.
Where was the joke? What was funny about Chris Rock calling out a balding woman… cancer, chemo, alopecia? He aimed a dagger at her head, her heart, her self esteem. Her reaction: a roll of eyes & cringe, expressed her belittlement. Will Smith spontaneously defended his wife with honor and integrity. In my book, that love counts more than all his trophies and awards.
I agree with you that what Will Smith did “counts more than all his trophies and awards.” I just don’t think he demonstrated “love,” Laura. Sadly, what Smith did negated the honors he’s received. Will Smith didn’t demonstrate love, nor did he defend his wife. He acted like a bully, and showed the entire world that he didn’t feel his wife was capable of defending herself. There were lots of appropriate ways he could have used his elevated status to respond. Instead he embarrassed himself, his wife, the Academy, and his fans. And he did his part to make the world a little less safe for people who exercise their right to free speech.
What’s amazing is that if there is anything Will Smith has proven in his career it’s that he has a gift for making correct choices. He has tons of talent and charisma, but you still don’t achieve the level of success he has, as a rapper, a sit-com star and a serious movie actor, without having crystal clear foresight. The one person I know who has worked with him (albeit 30 years ago on The Fresh Prince) described him as a lovely and gracious person, even as a young man. He has no history I’ve heard of violence of misbehavior of any kind. Even hearing him scream obscenities was shocking, let alone the physical assault. So why on perhaps the greatest night of his professional career did he self-destruct like that? There is no shortage of theories, but not sure we’ll ever really know for sure.
Unfortunately for those in the public eye like Will Smith, these types of displays, whether anomalies or not, will be remembered — and replayed — as long as Smith has a career.
He made a mistake, he is human and we unfortunately from time to time we tend to do that. We are a forgiving nation. I’m sure if he had to do it again, he would have restrained himself. I am not supporting his behavior, but we have all done things that we regret. He just happens to be in the spotlight.
If we all look back over our lives, we can count many times we wish we could have a do-over.
Move on and be glad you are not dealing with the devastation that is taking place around the world.
What’s important to me is that Smith initially laughed at the joke. It wasn’t until he saw his wife roll her eyes that he charged the stage like a knight defending his damsel. It was an animal response. He showed the present audience and all those watching on TV how macho he was with a surprise slap that Rock couldn’t foresee or event suspect. It’s a coward’s way to strike out at another without a warning. Smith will long be remembered for his sneak attack long after glitz of the golden statue fades from memory.
There are many ways of framing and adjudicating the Smith/Rock dustup; I’ve engaged in several of them on Twitter and in replies to NYT stories. Here’s the distillate, in my view: Will Smith lost his cool; Chris Rock kept his. Rock’s poise, his grace under pressure (to use Hemingway’s famous phrase, which derives from his encounters with bullfighters), was astonishing. It was magnificent, in fact. The word “aplomb” means that somebody is anchored, centered, in a way that echoes the dead-straight line of a plumb line, which comes from the ball of lead hanging on the end of the line. Rock manifested extraordinary aplomb. It was Jedi-master stuff. A few moments later, as he slid back on the stage and the award recipient gave his thank you’s, Rock looked terribly distraught. But when full focus was riveted on him, when a lifetime’s work hung in the balance and reputational damage shadowed every choice he made, he made perfect choices. He acted unselfishly. He kept it together; he kept things from sliding completely off the rails. It was an awesome display.
It’s not lost on me, Adam, that your years of experience playing music on stages and street corners around the world gives you extra insight into how very admirable (and difficult) Rock’s improvised response was. I’m sure you too were in uncomfortable situations that took every bit of your “grace under pressure” to handle properly as well. I think Chris Rock showed himself to be the consummate professional. It’s just too bad that Will Smith didn’t possess that same practiced restraint.
Thanks Bruce for this prospective. I was watching the Oscars that night and at first I thought it was a staged event, then realized it was not. I tried not to get caught up in the torrent aftermath, but it is everywhere. I wonder if Will’s Oscar win would have gotten as much press? We live in a society that craves outlandish behavior as it seems people are looking for shocks to aliven their souls, as simple pleasures are mundane. I did not feel that way, I just kept thinking — if only Will would have stopped and regrouped during is long walk to get to Chris, if only someone would have gotten up to stop him, if only Jada would have accepted the joke as that is part of job, if only…. So you are right there were many opportunities that night that were discarded due to egos that took control. And others shined because they did not react. True colors are revealed in the middle of a crisis. I was raised that you do not take your fights public, you pause, put the issue in order, check your ego, decide on your reaction, and address it in private — guess it is the Southern in me. Sophia Loren once likened an Italy woman to a Southern woman when talking to Johnny Carson — “When we are angry, we continue to smile and be a good host, but when the guests leave the fight begins.”
If only…Will had waited to talk to Chris Rock, after the show, in private….if only.
While Father Time robs us of so many things, while Mother Nature teaches us to take a moment, breathe, and let the dust settle — but we have to be open to her teachings.
“Mother Nature teaches us to take a moment, breathe, and let the dust settle…” Brilliant, Tina!!
I like what Kareem Abdul-Jabbar said:
“When Will Smith stormed onto the Oscar stage to strike Chris Rock for making a joke about his wife’s short hair, he did a lot more damage than just to Rock’s face. With a single petulant blow, he advocated violence, diminished women, insulted the entertainment industry, and perpetuated stereotypes about the Black community.”
I thought Kareem Abdul-Jabbar’s comments were spot on Jeff. Thank you for sharing.